Monday, March 25, 2013

hard times

I'm not very good at talking to people... but I am struggling a lot lately. I guess I figure if I let someone know, even if through here, it might help.

My PTSD is still around. And how do you explain to people that seemingly normal everyday things send me straight around the bend. So instead I just try to not crawl out of my own skin and hope I can escape as soon as I can. I almost didn't make it at work today but I managed to keep the sane look on the outside... it gets so tiring... yet funnily enough, I have the worst time trying to sleep.

Keeping my anger in check gets harder and harder, and then of course so does the accompanying anger at myself for being angry. I still struggle with my memory and that really frustrates me. I have ceased to even give a crap about my house (still full of my Dad's stuff) and so then I start to hate it and then myself more.

I'm not asking for sympathy... I just needed to say some things... in fact, if I can figure out how to stop comments on this post I will.